Tuesday, March 16, 2010

On Horoscopes

I love Running With Scissors. I love anything Augusten Burroughs churns out. I'd shell out 12.99 to purchase and read his grocery lists, put into a monosyllabic Excel spreadsheet. I would.

I learned a little trick from the insane Dr. Finch from Running With Scissors, called Bible Dipping, explained as such on the vaguely interesting Urban Dictionary as:

To Bible dip is to ask God a question about anything, then open the Bible to any page and point at a random word with your eyes shut. After your word is looked at by someone else you open your eyes and translate what the word means in relationship to your question.
"Hey mom, should we have fish sticks for dinner?"
"I don't know, let's do a Bible Dip."
*Does Bible dip*
"It says Awakening, as in awakening your taste buds, which therefore means we should have fish sticks for dinner."

I don't consult the Bible to decide what's for dinner, but occasionally I will use this slightly silly trick to answer more weighty questions, such as THE ONES ON MY MIND LATELY (or everything that's on my mind lately). It's fun and comforting, like spinning a globe when you're a kid to see where you'll live when you grow up.

Here's a haiku related to the globespin:

We hop onto planes
spin blue globes and point fingers
to new apartments

The last time I did one of these bible dips, my mind was hopping like a bucket of crickets in July. Spring, spring, springing from one troublesome thought to another. With a bit of a laugh I walked over to the bookshelf and pulled the Bible out, opened it, and jabbed my finger to a passage. I don't actually use the "word" technique, I just read whatever passage it comes to and try to read it with an ounce of the academic, a trace of mysticism, and a bunch of casual curiosity. The passage was the one in Matthew - the first book of the Gospel when the astrologers ask where the baby is, the baby that was born that will be the King of the Jews...

"After his birth astrologers from the east arrived in Jerusalem, asking, "Where is the child who is born to be king of the Jews? We observed the rising of his star, and we have come to pay him homage." Matthew - 2.2

I think I've mentioned before that I look at around six or seven different astrology columns daily - checking my horoscope, my husband's, my son's (which is the same as mine, Aquarius). It's a casual pastime, a little treat in my morning. Sometimes bits of advice or resonance knock my socks off, and others I roll my eyes and say, "That could be about anything! About anyone". But like I've said, sometimes big clues to my path and the Universe's plan for me/us have sailed out and looked at me square in the face. If astrologers saw in the stars that someone as historically and spiritually important as Jesus Christ was born, then I think the stars can tell me whether or not we should stay in Alaska or move back to Tennessee (there - there's the Big Decision we've been mulling over).

So I'll continue looking up to the stars (while I can still see them - it's getting lighter and lighter up here in Alaska!) for the answers. Everything is connected, everything is a message (though it might not be for me, or you, it could be for someone else entirely - that scrap of paper you find on the ground next to your car coming out of the coffeeshop with the words "Bacon, milk, apples" might have deep personal meaning to someone. It could be a message for them to open up that Bacon Milk and Apples restaurant they've always dreamed about, or to buy that apple orchard/farm to raise pigs and cows that they've been mulling over for the past twenty years. Occasionally I'll hear these whispers of truth in music, lately they've been "sail, go, fly"...

Now I'm sure there's a biological and psychological explanation for all of these occurrences. Neurons picking up on what our subconscious wants to hear. While I find the study of psychology and biology fascinating and true and important - it's a little dry. I love the unexplained. I don't want to explain it. I think these little clues are gifts - I don't care how they came about.

Case in point, my Free Will Astrology for this week:

Among Eastern religions, some traditions preach the value of getting rid of your desires. To be righteously attuned to current cosmic rhythms, however, I think you should rebel against that ideal, and instead cultivate a whole host of excellent desires. Use your imagination, please! Here are a few I highly recommend: a desire for a revelation or experience that will steer you away from becoming more like a machine; a desire for a fresh blast of purity from a primal source; a desire for an imaginary pet snake that teaches you how to be more playful with your libidinous energy; and a desire for a jolt of unexpected beauty that reminds you how important it is to always keep a part of your mind untamed.


Anonymous said...

I think you know that I would rather you be in Tennessee...but that's for my own personal issues...I want you to be closer to us and, if you're in TN, I always feel that there's a glimmer of hope that we can move there someday. However, you have to do what's best for you guys and only you guys know that.

Christina Marie said...

Tennessee! You guys have been on my mind quite a bit lately...hence the reason I'm reading your blog. I very rarely read them, but I'm so enjoying yours.

Chrissy Johnson said...

Aw, I appreciate both of you so much. Talk about two strong women on one page! Christy - thank you lady so much for visiting...it's such a mishmash but it's where I get all the clutter out from my brain. And sister love, thanks for talking to me today. xoxo